A not so good idea

I heard from someone (who will remain nameless) that sometimes it helps encourage kids to potty train if they have to clean up their pants when they have an accident. Hey, I'll try anything once if it might help the cause... here is how it went down:

Last night SBK was outside in her bikini, playing in the water and running around. Sure enough, I hear "Moooommmmy!!! I need to be cleaned up" - a sure sign that she has poopie panties (or bikini in this case). So we march into the bathroom and I explain to her how she is going to clean up and wash out her swimsuit bottoms. (I know, just writing this I now hear how ridiculous this sounds.) We start out great, she takes off her suit and tries to shake the "stuff" into the toilet. No go. She shakes harder. No go. It's like a slingshot at this point and I'm getting scared. I asked her to slow down and try to shake out her suit into the toilet a little more carefully. This is when she grabs the suit and is holding the "stuff" in the palm of her hand (it's still inside the suit, so she's not actually touching it). In slow motion she looks at it closely.... then closes her hand into a fist... squeezing the poo everywhere.

I'm pretty sure I'm losing my mind.